The Department store
Address:335-337 The Parade
Suburb:Beachtown
post code:Auckland 111
Phone number:098898899
WWW.thedepartmentstore.co.nz
27 July 2020
892 Smith Road
PO Box: 8042
892 Smith Road
PO Box: 8042
Dear Mr Simpson
Thank you for your email on the 27th of July. Advising me on the incident in our store. Im sorry that my staff treated you in an unprofessional manner and we are doing all we can to sort out this incident between you and my staff.
My staff member had no reason to treat you in that way. My staff member has been given a warning and will be attending further customer service tanning,. We would also like to include a $50 voucher which can be spent in any of our department stores.
Kind regards
Rebecca Smith
Manager- Footwear
The department store
first comment. BOOM!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteKia ora Caleb,
ReplyDeleteWell done on this! The formatting is good -- especially the letterhead, paragraphing, and sign-off. Don't forget to include a space after the date. Also, you don't need to write out 'Address', 'Suburb', etc.
When you write 'staff', perhaps 'staff member' would be better, because 'staff' seems to refer to a group of people rather than just one person.
There is a typo in your second paragraph -- 'tanning' should be 'training'.
Finally, have a last look at your use of capital letters in your sign-off (The Department Store).
This is a great first draft Caleb; it looks quite professional, and the tone and vocab are appropriate for audience and purpose. Really nice work. :)